Stranger Than Fiction

Today I finally saw Stranger Than Fiction.

I really loved it, in fact, it's been a long time since I enjoyed a movie that much.

That's all I wanted to say.

have a peaceful evening,

-geoff

Tests

I don't think that I've been this down about something unknown in a long time. I suppose I just feel a little lost in some way. Not in the, wow I'm totally alone and will never be happy again way, but the what is it I really think, what do I do next, kind of thing.

I think it's that I'm wanting is people to believe in me, but in reality life isn't that simple. Sometimes we have to do things on our own, and people will doubt us. I feel disowned by the people I tried to surround myself with, but I find it hard to believe that it could be that easy to understand. I think there has to be something in me that I'm not embracing fully and until I do things will stay this way. I love the people in my life, and I love myself, but I'm working towards making that the same emotion....

I trust God, and I trust that wherever I go in the next few years is where I'm meant to go, I just hope I let myself be the most effective and compassionate person I can be.

My trials will never end, no one's ever do.

I just hope I don't stray so far that I never walk back (though I suppose even if I do all I'd have to do was look around and realize I was never really alone anyways)

I'll leave it with these lyrics, because I love the way Johnny Cash sings this song,

Have a peaceful Fourth of July weekend,

Geoff.

Why Me Lord (Johnny Cash version)

Why me Lord,
what have I ever done
To deserve even one
Of the pleasures I've known

Tell me Lord,
what did I ever do
That was worth loving you
Or the kindness you've shown.

Lord help me Jesus,
I've wasted it so
Help me Jesus
I know what I am

Now that I know
that I've need you so
Help me Jesus,
my soul's in your hand

Tell me Lord,
if you think there's a way
I can try to repay
All I've taken from you

Maybe Lord,
I can show someone else
What I've been through myself
On my way back to you.

Lord help me Jesus,
I've wasted it so
Help me Jesus
I know what I am

Now that I know
that I've need you so
Help me Jesus,
my soul's in your hand.

I'm Losing Track

I haven't been thinking about days in terms of what day of the week it is anymore. It's all been what day I work, I don't give the days names, just work day. Weird....

When I was younger (as in like a week ago) I would always like to think about my funeral. Not the crying part or what my family and friends would be like, but what music I'd want to be played....because there would have to be music. One day I might even make a list of what songs I would want played, but I'd really have to think about it. I think I'd only need one song, and that would be Otis Redding's (Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay. I can't think of a better song, even if it doesn't deal directly with death, it's just my favourite song....so it'd have to be played right? haha This is probably not the most productive way to spend words, I could probably be writing something much more meaningful and lasting....why aren't I?

Because I'm choosing not to....which leads me into my point...yes....I have a point (though I confess I just thought of it a few seconds ago), there are problems in this world. I don't think there are many that wouldn't agree with that (though I'm sure there are some). There are problems in this world and we all wonder what is happening. Why are those in power letting this happen, why is God letting this happen. I use to think about those kinds of things a lot....why isn't God doing more....but I'm reading a book right now, and the answer to my previous question basically slapped me upside the head and now i'm walking around thinking to myself "duh!".....(the book by the way is Shane Claiborne's Irresistable Revolution)....we are vessels for God, we are His hands, He acts through us so in order for anything to change....well I guess we'd have to get off the computer and out into the streets or something radical like that. I sort of see humans as doors which God likes to walk through from time to time, and we choose to be open or closed. So this sort of boils down to, "hey, if you want things to change, why don't you do something about it". That said, positive results shouldnt be attributed to certain people. It's not us, it's a divine force acting through us..........yeah


So now I'm goint to go get ready for work

Hope where these words find you is exactly where you're suppose to be

-geoff

See The Sun

It's funny how sometimes, just as we're getting comfortable with something, we feel the need to push ourselves away from whatever we think is providing the stability. I think I might be doing this, and I guess I'm doing it because nothing is certain in this life (save a few holy sentiments) and to really commit to something I usually require certainty. That's kind of silly though, because I'll never ever do anything worthwhile if I'm always worried something might not happen. Maybe I shouldnt worry about things in life not working out, because failure in this life is going to happen, and success will come too. Good will come from failure and Bad from success. I think that's the inevitable, the way the universe balances itself out.

Haha today is my birthday, but most of the celebratory stuff I did on Friday with my family. I'd say the last two days have been pretty darn good. I workkkkk in a few hours, lame 3-9 shift, but I suppose there's a reason for it right?

This might be my last post for a couple of weeks, I'm off to Eureka to help my grandmother do some of the work around her house she can't really do anymore. I figure it'll be good for me too, no internet, no real phone reception. A kind of faux isolation...but not really, only a little bit. Anywaysss peace to all the nobodies reading this

-geoff

I'm Going To Give This Another Try

It's been a long long time since I've posted anything in this. It's really weird looking back at the two lonely posts of last fall. I feel like it's the kind of thing where my outlook on life has altered enough for me to just not even know what I was talking about back then. "I wish I knew what I know now" kinda stuff, but not really. Haha I suppose I'm going to embrace the ignorance of yesterday and today because it's all pretty important.

This summer I think I'd like to find God, but right now I'm going to go shower, gots me a birthday dinner to go to.

Maybe something like this will keep me occupied this summer, I hope it does

-geoff

Marsh King's Daughter

This is how I'm spending my saturday night, at least for now? I'm just too tired to go anywhere i guess, which isnt entirely true since i just did the mile or so stroll to Macy's (which is probably the best coffee place ever, cool people and sometimes they play beatles music at night. everyone should go there!)It's a nice walk, especially at night, and no one is out on the streets of Flagstaff, which isnt that suprising i guess. Most people are off partying, but i'm probably too much of a dork for that. Some random girls yelled to me and asked if i had a girlfriend, i dont think i've ever been in a situation like that. it was dark and i couldnt even see them that well, so to avoid being kidnapped i said i was busy or something like that. i'm sure that'll be a great story someday, but for now its just kinda like "hey remember that awkward time...."......yeah.

Woah
the last few days have been intense. i have so many tests/papers coming up. also, my roomate moved out because...well, just because. looking for a new one kindaaaaaa. i went to the really rad irish pub in downtown last night, i always go there for some fish n chips ,they do it well, and i'm not sure why, and now i'm wondering how long i could keep this sentence going, probably a long time, i've got a lot of useless info i could just start throwing out there, it's a good "stream of conciousness" type thing, i dont really like that term ,the snotty sophmore in my english class used it to describe a lou reed song the other day and i wanted tooooo vomit, one because i was sorta sick and two because he thinks he knows everything. i went to go get devendra banhart's new cd last night also, at the local barnes n noblessss. shelled out my 15 galleons forr it, i could tell the cashier was bored, i guess "the barne" (as i've just now decided to call it) isnt a happenin joint at 930 on a friday night. he kept talking with the security guard who was also bored, a popular theme? i got their brand of "mocha pumpkin spice" coffeee too, it's ehh. longgg walk back to my dorm which is isolated from the rest of campus. i got the strange urge to do my laundry at that point, which was like 1030. i didnt finish tilllll midnight ,and then i rearranged my room. useless info but hey at the same time it's sorta cool.....not really, but maybe a little.



just to get an idea...



helpful? for a guy you bet



i blew out my old headphones so i had to go back to the huge alien style ones, which i'm pretty sure i've ruined also

i dont get along with headphones too well,....it's complicated

(it should be noted i got a lot of weird looks from the two girls doing their laundry while i was taking these three pictures before my battery died,then again, they were the ones doing laundry at midnight too, i'm not sure who else they expected to do that on a friday night)

everyone should check out devendra banhart's new cd, i've really been enjoying it

also, if you can find the track "marsh king's daughter", you should listen to it. Might be helpful if you know that eisely does that track

i'm out for the night, to all the people that don't read this,


peace and love
or
war and hate

whatever floats your boat

-geoff

First Post Sorta Stuff

Wow, finally I get to make a blog. It's actually quite exciting....not even joking. I'm Geoff (not lying about that one). I enjoy a crap load offff stuff. ehh that's a massive subject that I won't tackle at the moment for fear of pulling a hammy or breaking my face. My life story ain't too interesting unless i get to use hand gestures,which i dont it would seem. At first i was thinking i would use caps when needed......i guess i gave up on that already.

College
I started that part of my life about a month or so ago. It's nice i guess, freedom of sorts but at the same time i feel some whatttttttt ,disenchanted w/ the whole thing. "Hey man, it's saturday, lets get wasted!!!!", to which i usually reply "thats okay, i think ill stay in my room and watch a movie". I should probably get out more, drop the probably, I should get out more. maybe i'll start paying people to hang out with me, rather maybe i'll join a club! oh the endless possibilities. the classes are whateverrrr, i'm not like "yes it's time for class" but i mean some of it's interesting. It's more clique-ish than i thought it would be here in Flagstaff, but then again i'm not sure what i expected. Also, it's not like i've met everyone on campus or anything like that, so in time i'm sure ill find a nice little niche.

I Was Recently In Sacramento
The place i call home...yes i flew back this last friday to suprise my dad for his birthday (the big 50) and he was just that, 50 and suprised. I was sick most of the time so that wasnt too fly, but i was hot?....i'm not sure if anyone will get that joke. I got to spend monday with some friends thoughhhh and i wasnt sick so it was all around good, i even got to take in a show at the Boardwalk that nite, Eisley was playing with Mute Math. Huge Eisley fan so that was really rad, their shows are always some kinda funnnn. I hated the fact that i had to fly there though, i'm not too much of a plane person. preferable? i'm taking the train through the Seirra Mountain Range, but alas life can't always be what we want.

Beirut
is an amazing band. end of story

Since I'm Putting Off Studying...
Well since i missed all those classes being in sac-town ,i am officially screwed. Like, royal FUBAR'd. Huge anthropology test tomorrow at 8 in the morning and i missed all the most important stuff PLUS the review on tuesday morning....basically it's awesome. i've been putting all that off by posting thisss and i guess i can't avoid it any longer. so i leave you with this quote from the recently found innocent Phil Spector

"I think i killed somebody"

i think we are all pretty sure you did Phil, and yet they still found you innocent. ahhhh what a world


-geoff